BOBBY SMITH LOOKS BACK TO SOME OF WOLVES DARKER DAYS WHEN WOLVES REALLY WERE BAD
Fans today, especially those who have only ever seen Wolves in the top-flight, are somewhat spoilt.
I chuckle when I hear people complain about our formation, or how the manager has ‘lost the plot’ and that the football is so ‘boring.’
Well, those of us who got into football during the early 1980s know for sure that we are currently going through a golden period, by way of comparison.
It seems barely believable, but Wolves really did suffer three successive relegations (1983-86), as they toppled into the 4th Division, with doubts about their very existence also chucked into the mix. Throw in a dastardly foreign owner (the Bhatti Brothers) and the similarity between then and now in some ways rings true. However, the truth is somewhat different. Jeff Shi, although annoying at times, does not compare to his predecessors, who governed our club when it was suffering genuine financial pressure. Nowadays our main concern seems to be why we did not splash the cash on a replacement for Max Kilman, especially given the injury to Yerson Mosquera. Back in the early 1980s, by way of contrast, we had more pressing issues, such as finding the money to simply pay the milkman.
We were broke.
Of course, given that we had no money, the football on the pitch was shocking, with season 1984/85 (Div 2) being the nadir, for one simple reason: we went five months without even scoring a home goal. Yep, you read that right; we failed to score in ten successive home games, with no close season included in the timespan. When diminutive winger, Paul Butler, scored in the 38th minute against Wimbledon in an entertaining 3-3 thriller (November 17, 1984) no one in the crowd (7,134) could possibly have imagined that we would not score again at Molineux until April 13, 1985, when we lost 2-1 to Oxford United (Campbell Chapman). The crowd that day was 10,647, which was boosted by a large contingent of Oxford fans, roaring their team onto an away victory, a small step on the road to their winning the league that season.
There is video footage of this goal on You Tube, which is celebrated as if Wolves had won the League, The FA Cup and the Texaco Trophy all in one moment. Sadly, I was not there for this one but do know people who were, and they still talk about it to this day.
Wolves 1 Oxford United 2 13th April 1985 Football League Division Two
Taken as a whole, season 84/85 was truly depressing, with only four players scoring more for Wolves than the own goals tally of three: Alan Ainscow, Tony Evans and Mark Buckland, all with 5 and Tommy Langley with 4. That season we cornered the market in the old and past it centre-forward, as we also had Peter Eastoe and Ray Hankin up front, with Hankin at least providing a physical presence with his extended belly. Amazingly, he did score a goal off said body part and this goal is also immortalised forever on You Tube (4-1 defeat to Notts County on March 23, 1985).
Notts County 4-1 Wolves 23rd March 1985 Football league division two
The famous Tommy Docherty was our manager at the time but sadly he ended up with more soundbites than points. Always one for the media, he joked that he was signed to take Wolves out of the Second Division and that he was true to his word as we endured relegation to the third. He also agreed to the cameras being allowed into the dressing room at a time when this was unusual, as they followed the development of Derek Ryan (41 games, 5 goals between 1984-86), our fleet-footed winger/striker. The BBC programme in question, Moment of Truth, striped away the romance from the game and showed the real nuts and bolts of football in the 80s. Certainly, it was a product that SKY would not have touched with a bargepole, as studs and dubbing were to the fore, rather than the glamour and fancy cars of the modern era Premier League.
I liked the programme, though, as we saw a different side to Wolverhampton Wanderers; one of angst, lost innocence and the sheer delight at playing football, despite the cloying pressure of living up to past decades of relative success.
Other players of note that season included Mark Buckland, who gave his all but his all was never enough, Jim Melrose, who looked great on loan but we were never able to afford his 40k transfer fee, and the fading talents of Geoff Palmer and Alan Dodd. We were indeed a strange mix of experience (Alan Ainscow, Andy King) and the young and emerging; Tim Flowers, Paul Dougherty. In short, we used 29 players that season and most were not good enough. Funnily enough, looking back at that squad they all look incredibly small, Hankin excepted, and some could have passed themselves off as mascots, especially in those genital hugging shorts!
Ouch!
The season as a whole saw us win a paltry eight matches. We drew a further nine and lost twenty-five, including 5-1 goal drubbings against Grimsby, Barnsley and, of course, Brighton. To our shame we ended up with a goal difference of minus forty-two, despite having a quality goalkeeper in the shape of Tim Flowers between the sticks.
I should mention our attendances during the campaign, as they were quite shocking for a 2nd Division team. They peaked at 14,908 for the opener against Sheff Utd, a 2-2 draw that saw us get a point with goals by Alan Dodd and Tommy Langley. However, given our penchant for defeats, our home attendance plummeted to 4,422 for our final game against Huddersfield, when we achieved a rare 2-1 victory, via goals from Ryan and Ainscow. Therefore, I laugh when people complain about £71 seats still available on general sale at Molineux this season. Trust me, you have not lived until you have seen Molineux at only 20 per cent capacity. What a depressing thought. In fairness, though, England was in the grip of a recession and football violence was at its peak, so pretty much every club had reduced attendances during the early 1980s.
For Wolves, however, worse was to come.
The following season saw us relegated once more (1985/86), as we completed the set to end up in the bottom tier of English football, with our attendances down to around 3,500 per match. However, it did also see us sign a couple of players who were to be major faces in our rebirth; Floyd Streete, that colossus of a centre-half, midfielder Mickey Holmes and Andy Mutch, our goal-hanger of a scouser with the penchant for offsides and flapping ears, not to mention a lot of 3-yard tap ins.
Things could only get better.
And they did.
ARTICLE BY BOBBY SMITH
Ex-A Load of Bull writer who loves punk and Oi! music, Chris Woakes, Test Match cricket, Wolverhampton Wanderers, military history. Author of One Love Two Colours and The Armageddon Pact.