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if you fancy a chuckle Sean stanton pokes fun at the latest round of REFEREEING debacles in the premier league

PGMOL chief Howard Webb has called a meeting of all Premier League referee’s after another calamitous weekend of shocking decisions. In my humble opinion Webb should sack every single one of them and then pop over to the nearest circus and hire a load of clowns. Surely they can’t do any worse than the fools they will be replacing.

Just over two years ago the then Wolves manager Nuno was fined £25,000 for stating in a post match interview that Lee Mason was not fit to referee in the Prem. Mason carried on and spent the next few months proving Nuno right, making howler after howler and by the end of the season there was good news and bad.

The good news ?

Mason was no longer an on field referee.

The bad news ?

He’s was now a dedicated VAR official.

Since then Big Lee has been consistently crap, culminating in his error failing to spot an offside in the build up to Brentford’s equaliser against Arsenal on Saturday that incurred the wrath of lego man on speed, Mikel Arteta. 

You can imagine it. Big Lee was probably sitting on the bog at Stockley Park reading “the Sun” when Ivan Toney equalised.

“Quick Lee there’s been a goal”

” Who scored ? One of the big six ?”

“No, Brentford”

“In that case we’ll have to find a way to disallow it”

And even then. He missed the blindingly obvious.

The fact that Lee Mason is still in any kind of job in an officiating capacity with the PGMOL is a complete mystery.

Personally I think he has some photographs of Howard Webb in a compromising position with a Goat. Either that or they are all part of some kind of old boys network who are having a big laugh at everyone else’s expense.

Just think of some of those whose incompetence we have had to endure over the recent seasons.

ANDRE MARINER – Too old

GRAHAM SCOTT – Too thick

PAUL TIERNEY – Too smug

SIMON HARPER – Too blind

DAVID COOTE – Too ugly

MIKE DEAN – Too all of the above

Oh yeah and JARRED GILLETT – Too Australian.

You only have to watch the ex refs who’ve made it onto TV to realise how lacking in intelligence they all are. Firstly the one who does Ref Watch on Sky Sports, who looks like that bloke from “The Hills have eyes” Dermot Gallagher. And then there’s Peter “try and stay awake until I reach the end of my sentence ” Walton on BT. Both of them as dull as dish water and backing up the ref’s decisions however ludicrous they are.

These day’s when the ref is having a bad day angry fans will chant “You don’t know what you’re doing” or “You’re not fit to referee” I chant along with them because I’m now a parent and don’t want to swear in front of my kids but I must admit when Jarred Gillett sent Mario Lamina off for sweet FA on Saturday at 3.27pm what I wanted to hear was “The referee’s a wanker” or even better “Who’s the bastard in the black”

No offence intended to anyone who was born out of wedlock.

Sean Stanton

ARTICLE BY SEAN STANTON

Born in Wolverhampton. Raised in Dudley, Drank in the Beacon in Sedgley until he had children. Now drinks at home.

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